I do this why?

I am the sickest pregnant person out there, and yet I am choosing to keep on having babies lol.
I guess in the end it must be worth it ;)
But, boy do I suffer.
I am on the maximum dose of the pregnancy drug for vomitting. thats 8 pills a day. The cost of these things is insane. Thank goodness we get 100% coverage.
I still think I am doing pretty well compared to the last 2. With them, I threw up day and night....and was taking only 4 pills a day (no one told me I could take more !!)
This time, I almost always lose my dinner lol. I get sickest in the afternoon and evening. Every day. No fail.
I have only had morning sickness a few times.
I am really trying to do what I can to manage, as this time I am working.
I have some better days. and then some really bad ones.
Like last night. I could not keep anything down, and even my saliva was making me puke LOL.
Yes, it was bad.
I passed out just after 8pm thank goodness.
Today is ok so far again. I managed breakfast. But I know, afternoon hits and I feel the nausea. Sigh.
3 more weeks until the first trimester ends. I pray I get some relief!
I really want to keep working. its good for me.
I have gained a few pounds already! EEEK.
I am paranoid about getting fat again after losing all the weight before.
I know its in my belly and boobs right now hehe.
As soon as I get some energy back I need to start walking. Then it will be prenatal classes I think. no need to gain too much with this one. I am not sitting at home!

So yes, that is what is going on here. the kids are excited. James told me my belly was growing and soon I am going to be fat...LOL nice kid.
I have NO idea what I think this one is....And I love the fact I am not going to find out. it is making this experience fun.

I think we will be keeping it all a secret...names included :D

My first instinct says girl. As I think I was more evening sick with Arianna. But who knows. I think is my ass and thighs grow it is a girl LOL.
Brandon wants another boy.
I have no preference. Boy would be nice for James....and then Arianna can move into her own room eventually.

Rose will be done with us when the baby is born.
And things are not 100% but, I do not think I will be going back to my line at work.
Things for me have not been the way I want them.
My kids and family have not always been number one. And that bugs me.
For example. I had to miss Ariannas sports day cause of work. I hate that.
I want it to be that I work when I want...and my kids always come first.
So, I think we will be making some changes.
I thnk home is where I will be number one, and work will come second....when its convenient.
The reason I did my nursing was so one day when kids were old, I had something to go back to. It turned into more work then I had anticipated, for many reasons, but we are going to fix it.
No regrets for the last year and a half as I gained many skills and confidence as a nurse. Now I can feel comfortable working occasionaly.
Besides, I do not want someone else seeing this new baby walk for the first time...I was there for the first 2, and I will be for this one.....

Phew. good enough update?